Almost revelation

As I sit here tonight, reflecting even more about the recent transpiring events of finding an apartment, getting an interview on Monday at Hastings, and further making connections, I can’t help but feel like there is a giant cosmic plan being played out. One I can almost glimpse, but not quite. Think V for Vendetta, where, seemingly unrelated events are all connected into a much larger and deeper plot that spins and revolves and is so much bigger than just one person. That is exactly how I feel. It is the manner that things are playing, that everyday, there is the subtle expectancy of great things that continues to grow deep down within me. I feel something is in motion that is bigger than just me and those around me, yet, at the same time, everything is connected in ways that we cannot see.

I continue to wrestle with finding a faith community to plug into and share my giftings, experience, and knowledge. Not only that the community and body would be edified and encouraged, but that I would be grown as well by being immersed and surrounded by their gifting, experiences, and knowledge. For I realized long ago, that everything is not about me. I actually just had a conversation with a friend today about how when I call myself a Christian, I am saying that my life is not my own. I gave my life away to gain something better. I do not live as I wish to live, but I live as the one I follow, trust, and surrender to wishes, leads, and directs me to live. For instance, I think there is nothing wrong with having the occasional alcoholic drink, all in moderation of course, yet I have the personal conviction that I should not partake, no matter what. Too what end? I do not know, but I trust in the one that is greater than me. I trust in the one that saw through shame, mockery, flogging, and crucifixion to see my lost and tainted self/spirit/soul, died and rose again, that I might have a chance to live and experience life to the fullest. Talk about living life for more than yourself. That is an ultimate example of selflessness. May I never forget it.